My Jewlery Box

Rings that spend most of their lifetime sitting in a slot ignored, avoided, and even regreted.

There are many that reside, many that haven’t been worn in years due to the value. I do not mean value as worth of money, but the person represented by their meaning. They are valuable in the memory that comes with them. There are few I can’t stand to wear anymore, but for some reason I can’t get rid of them. To get rid of them would be forgetting or do you not forget. Leaves the question is a memory still there is there is no evidence of it. Can we forget someone that we don’t see anymore? In my experience those analogies are all false. I have burned pictures, love letters, cards etc. but yet people still hang around in the memories of a woman who has many mistakes. Who has given love to people who didn’t deserve her love in the first place. I gave it away like it was some damn free sale, then later deeply regreted the idioticness of actions. I have tried not to regret, everywhere I have been, has brought me to where I am today. Mistakes and actions i did while i was growing taught me life lessons you can only learn from making them. Life is a whole list of pro’s and con’s nothing is 100%. Every decision we make has an outcome, sometimes that outcome is not what was meant in the first place. Maybe it really isn’t up to our control. End of day, the poems, my books, songs written i wouldn’t have reason to write them unless this rollercoaster I have lived fell of the track a few times. just kidding, more than a few.

  • The wedding band– the ring of my mother, who was married to the man that raised me since I was two years old. He is the only dad I have ever known. The ring is a memory she no longer wanted, but to me it is a reminder of the love they once had. They are now divorced, have been for many years. Childhood was rough from becoming a teen, they fought a lot. But yet still they have been at both my sister’s weddings and have managed to get along, us kids where one thing they always put first.
  • The ring of a woman I never met– Many years ago I was given a ring, that was once his mothers. He had lots of jewelry he hoped to pass down to his daughter. When we first met things were an odd situation. He was divorced and I was almost 6 months pregnant with someone else’s son. He gave me the ring because he said his mom would have loved me. The story is a long one for a later time. All I know is this woman was a strong woman who had many struggles, but the ring is a classic and yet me and that man didn’t work out I never got rid of the ring… I found it disrespectful to her memory.
  • My Crown that once sat on my engagement finger– I dated a man for almost 4 years on and off. It was an imperfect situation; he was supposed to raise my son as his own. But he loved booze, and alcohol more than he loved actual human beings. He had a severe drinking problem, and for many years did all his store runs. In a hopeless hope he would someday change. It became an unsafe situation for me and my kids. He was a verbal, emotional abuser. who enjoyed beating people up. Which is far worse than of the man that actually hit me. That abuse stays with you, and it hinders any healthy confidence in yourself. One day I got brave enough to cancel the wedding and leave him for good. We left him behind. If I hadn’t, I might not be here today.
  • My Rosegold Opal– I met a guy in college, who I fell for right away. He was younger than me, by 5 years. We instantly clicked and became best friends. At the time I was a hard-working momma, homeless on a couch, and trying to get my life together. He still lived with his mother. She liked me and my kids, but she felt I was too much for her son, and he wasn’t ready to be a stepdad. The ring she actually thought he bought for her, but really was for me. It was a wrong time, and place kind of thing. I feel no hard feelings, and I’m glad he has found happiness now. cheers to the god memories.
  • The Pearl Antique– I bought this ring at a flea market. I have no clue of its history or where it been. I no worth or its meaning. To me it caught my eye. It was worth something to someone once upon a time. Now it sits for the occasional wearing of a woman on a journey.

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